[Photo Copyright 2008 Ted Rall]

A year ago, Milwaukee-based We Energies  (4,200 employees) asked us to design a multi-generational workshop that their trainers could learn, and then roll-out to the organization.

This was a maiden voyage for us. When charting unknown waters, we’ve found it helpful to ask, “What’s the real purpose of this training?”

We chose: “to develop generational diplomats at We Energies.”

We chose the “diplomacy” metaphor intentionally. Anyone can learn the differences between Boomers, X’ers and Millennials. But as U.S. News reports, Boomers plan to hang out in the workforce longer. And Pew’s research shows that the digital divide between generations is growing larger.

Multigenerational teaming will become more important in the coming decade.

So we need employees who can do more than just tick-off the key characteristics of their generational workmates. We need them to rock those differences, become trusted go-to folks among all their teammates, and crank out awesome work.

That’s what diplomats do:

“Usually a diplomat’s main goal is to simply maintain good relations with the country in question. By speaking with the leaders and establishing a friendly relationship, a diplomat not only establishes himself as a trustworthy person, but also builds trust in his own country. This could even be for the ultimate goal of establishing a treaty or becoming allies. If done correctly, diplomacy is a great way for countries to get every single issue out on the table and establish a great relationship.” [Source]

How could our training help Boomers become diplomats with Gen Xers and Millennials? How could we help Xers and Millennials to do the same?

Here are the five principles of diplomacy we’ve settled on, to help clients unite and ignite their multi-generational teams. Considering these, are you an effective generational diplomat?

Principle #1: Seek to put others (of different generations) in an advantageous position.

This is the first mistake we see in many companies. Boomers, for example, think younger generations feel entitled. Millennials feel Boomers are stuck-in-the-mud. This generational self-righteousness doesn’t help anyone.

To become a generational diplomat, you have to see the good in the other. You must assume positive intent. If you do this, you will start from a place of respect - rather than a place of judgment - and get more accomplished.

Principle #2: Win over the local population.

Many of us work on teams with Boomers, Xers and Millennials. However, when it comes to the people we really see “eye-to-eye” with, it’s a much smaller entourage.

To be a generational diplomat, you must build trust and establish rapport with everyone on your team, not only the people you like.

For example, if Baby Boomer Bob wants to be respected among the Millennials in his group, he should look beyond their generational differences and find ways to build trust and mutual respect. Maybe Bob sees Millennial Michele struggling with a coworker who’s a known pain in the ass (“P.I.T.A.”). Bob could pull Michele aside and mention that he sees how hard she’s struggling with Pita, and how he’s learned to work with him.

Principle #3: Gain intelligence.

Several months ago, Rebecca was trying to get her puppy, Ru, to sleep in a new crate. Ru wouldn’t do it. Over time, she didn’t even want to come into the room where the crate was.

Thankfully, Rebecca was reading Inside of a Dog, in which the author suggests that to really understand your dog, you have to understand their umwelt, their world.

So one night, RebeccaI got down in the crate herself. She laid in it. She looked around. She hung out, just seeing what Ru’s view was, inside that crate.

Rebecca didn’t notice anything weird, except the smell. The crate smelled new. And as you know, dog’s noses are very sensitive. (They can smell one teaspoon of salt added to a swimming pool!)

While Rebecca was hanging out in Ru’s crate, Ru came over and started to sniff Rebecca’s legs. Eventually, Ru stuck her head inside the crate and looked at Rebecca like, “What are you doing in there?”


That night, Ru walked herself into her crate and laid down. All by herself. And she’s been fine ever since.

As a generational diplomat at work, it’s critical to try to see the world as other generations see it. Whenever possible, listen to other generations. Attend workshops. Observe them. Try to understand their umwelt, how they see the world, their frame of reference, and what matters most to them.

That way, you can structure your words and behaviors in ways that are respectful and not injurious to them.

Principle #4: Base your actions on a “cause.”

As a generational diplomat, your cause may be “To unite the generations on my team, so we can all achieve something amazing.” If you can raise the purpose - or cause - of your actions beyond yourselves, you tap into a basic human need: to be a part of something bigger.

If you do this consistently, generational differences will dissolve.

Principle #5: Think “Win-Win” how can both/all generations achieve a positive outcome?

When United Way of Milwaukee County  was trying to design a new pledge card, it started as a generational face-off. Boomers (and their elders) liked the old pledge cards, and didn’t see the need for a new one. But the Xers and Millennials felt the card could be so much more attractive and effective.

After months of meetings, they hashed it out and ALL generations are satisfied - even delighted - with the new pledge card. It’s an excellent example of what can happen when all generations feel heard.

Patrick Lencioni reminds us that to work effectively in a professional team, you don’t have to have consensus. But everyone must feel heard. So, listen.

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